Wednesday, 27 May 2009

A reminder for me & anyone else...

I had resigned myself to nothing... really, sadly. I was at that place where I had done everything I could have done and yet nothing was changing, as far as I could see anyway.

So as usual that day I dressed up to go no where, I sat in my bedroom, and if I remember correctly I was entertaining myself, singing, day -dreaming... doing my best not to go there, there being to the land of dark, discouraging thoughts. and then it happend.

My sister, burst into the room and begins to scream "you got it! Mum just collected it." I could not believe it! one minute I am lying on my bed the next I am holding my sister we are laughing and then I begin to cry, like really cry and my sister begins to cry too. and we just stand there holding each other. crying.

I wish I could tell you how long you had to go through the wait, the pain, Just two weeks left, another night to go. I wish God did tell us that :)

In this present pain know this, you will praise him yet again. you may feel like your floating now, going through the motions, unseen and unheard by Him who loves you. But he is closer now more than ever.

psalm 126:1 "When the Lord restored his exiles to Jerusalem it was like a dream"

psalm 42: 5 &11 " Why am I so discouraged? Why am I so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again- My Saviour, my God

psalm 18: 16-17: "You reached down from heaven and rescued me; he drew me out of deep waters. He delivered me from my powerful enemies, from those who hated me and were too strong for me."

psalm 125:1 " Those who trust in the Lord are as secure as Mount Zion: they will not be defeated but will endure forever."

What am trying to say is God got our back no matter how things look now, irrespective of how we feel.


Tuesday, 19 May 2009

A prayer for the heavy heart:

Father in heaven, I worship you and give you praise for you alone are God, and forever you are worthy.
Lord Jesus you know pain both the physical and the emotional, your hands were pierced, you were beaten so much you could barely walk, barely stand straight. at the time you needed your friends they left, the moment you needed your Father he looked away.
It's funny how so many times we feel you can't understand a heavy heart, we feel you can't understand fear and pain... when there is that picture of you praying so passionately and fervently at gethsemane. That's why you are the ideal high priest of your people.

Jesus friend of the broken hearted, and the weary soul, You who is the God of all comfort. you who understands when no one else can... you who never belittles our pain, doubts or fears. Jesus I ask you to stay close just as you said in your word that you are close to the broken hearted... I ask that tonight you will wipe every tear, and sedate every restless and stressed spirit.

I ask Lord that you will offer counsel, peace and strength. Just when we begin to believe we can't go on...Jesus empower us from within.

Help me to be more sensitive to the needs and pains of others around me. I believe in you Jesus,

Thank you Lord because you never turn away a seeker. Give us your strength O Lord, and testimony, For we belong to you, we believe in you Jesus. You Can bring us out for you are a deliverer. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Monday, 11 May 2009

still on the prodigal son...

In the parable of the prodigal son, we are told that when he returned home, his father rejoiced and changed his clothing, he gave him a beautiful robe for his drab, stained and stinky attire.

that is exactly what our Father in heaven does for us, that is what he did for us on calvary.

Jesus took it all, and everyday till the day he returns to us he takes it all, all our shameful acts, all our vile and negativity, and he gives us who he is, he makes us worthy of him, by placing his glory upon us!!

we all fall down, make mistakes, run away from his wisdom to find our way...

we all fall down, But our Father is rooting for our rising up, our coming home.

There is no act too great for his Love or his Blood.

"But sin didn't and doesn't, have a chance in the competition with the aggressive forgiveness we call grace. When it is sin versus grace, GRACE wins hands down." ( The Message Bible)

keep surviving on grace.


Thursday, 7 May 2009

I was talking to Believer ( can't get this link thing sorted!!) on sunday, and sharing with her the message from the preacher in my church; a message on discouragement and finding solace in God.

Today, my mind wandered to the story of the prodigal son, and something in me connected with him so much. having a father who is so powerful, so well-to-do, can hook you up to the latest concerts, front row seats to everything, so huge a persona that you can actually call Bill Gates' Billy' to his face if I might add and get away with it!!

There was this young man seeing how great his father was, and feeling that his father was not utilizing his 'authority' enough; I wonder if the son's thoughts were 'Let me have my share of money then I can live the way a King's son is suppose to.' the bible records that he got his wish, and decided to live it up, parties, events, exotic locations... just the way royalty should live.

and then what happened. he went dry, both financially and other-wise, the brother was not just broke in pocket, he was broke in spirit; and he decided 'I'm going back home.'

sometimes, I do feel like i know better than God, I know right? crazzzzyyy! but I do, especially since by profession I am a writer, so I go 'God if i was writing the story of my life... I won't let X and Y happen'; I do think, God with all your power: blast this, do that, give Y, take O... and on, and on. I cry out " why the discipline?", "why the waiting?"

like the prodigal son, I am tempted to think that I am better off away from my Father's side, away from his rein and control.

But like the prodigal son, I come to my senses and decide "there is no place like home."

I choose to remain in his shadows.

I hope you do too.

"Those who live in the shelter of the Most High, will find rest in the shadows of the Almighty." Ps91:1

"Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." John 16:33

keep surviving on grace.